


why do i keep coming back

by orphan_account



Category: EXO (Band), f(x)
Genre: Alternate Universe - America, Angst, Childhood Friends, F/M, M/M, Multi, Polyamory, They're all super smart and nerdy, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-30
Updated: 2018-09-30
Packaged: 2019-07-20 21:30:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16145915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Sehun’s always been around to distract him and worry him and care, and maybe it was somewhere along the line that Jongin fell for him. He’s so tantalizing and perfect and terrible and out of reach, and--and then there’s Krystal. Krystal, with her beautiful smile that no one ever sees, and her weird jokes, and her ability to code the hell out of anything, with hereverything.He loves them both, but he can’t have it all, can he?WIP.





	why do i keep coming back

**Author's Note:**

> this will probably never be completed, but i've been sitting on it for far too long. RIP.
> 
> to clarify, this was going to end up with sekaistal together and happy. feel free to ask me questions about how the story was supposed to go, i have it written out in my head but it's hard to write down physically.
> 
> also, all of the characters are pretty nerdy and it reflects a bit oops

"Fucking finally," Sehun says, not even lifting his head up from the screen of his phone. "You've been pining after her for way too long." He's an asshole like that. Jongin just scoffs, tries not to sound to hurt; Sehun's standoffish even on his best days. 

 

"So that's all you're gonna say?" Jongin asks. He doesn't move from the doorframe of Sehun's bedroom, just peers in, and the happiness that had been running through his veins moments ago has now ebbed away. 

 

Sehun shrugs. Jongin doesn't really know what he had expected (jealousy? a congratulations?), but it wasn't this. He slams the door and turns to call Krystal. They're going on a date tonight anyways.

 

\--

 

Krystal's got him pressed up against a wall, up on her tiptoes so she can reach his hair. Her lips don't linger on any one place for long, kissing along his jawline and down his neck. Jongin loves it, loves the thrill of his hands on her hips, his lips on hers. 

 

She pulls away to look at him and smirks. It's a good look on her, confidence; her lips are obscenely red, a shiny flush rising on her cheeks. 

 

"Too fast?" Krystal asks. Her hands are still on his shoulders, fisting at the material of his shirt.

 

He wants to smirk back, reply with something flirty, but instead he rests his head back against the wall and nods dazedly. It’s a sensory overload, her hands and her hips and her smile, but he keeps thinking about the way Sehun looked when he left. His pale face lit up by his phone, his collarbones prominent underneath a low-cut tank.

 

She laughs, her hands sliding down his arms to meet his fingers. "Maybe it's time to drop you home then," she suggests. "Getting late anyways."

 

"Yeah, why not." He squeezes her hands gently, interlocking their fingers. This feels easier for Jongin, less dangerous. Their goodnight kiss is chaste; it feels like a promise and a warning, all at once.

 

\--

 

Jongin’s known Sehun for what feels like his entire life, and Krystal for all of high school. It was always the three of them, always weathering through olympiads and finals and math and life together. Sehun’s always been around to distract him and worry him and care, and maybe it was somewhere along the line that Jongin fell for him. He’s so tantalizing and perfect and terrible and out of reach, and--and then there’s Krystal. Krystal, with her beautiful smile that no one ever sees, and her weird jokes, and her ability to code the hell out of anything, with her _everything_. Jongin knows that he’s been in love with her since the moment they met on the first day of high school. She had punched Baekhyun in the face for being an asshole and Jongin had to escort her to the principal’s office, and he knew that he was a goner.

 

He loves them both, but he can’t have it all, can he?

 

\--

 

Sehun’s short to him the next morning--which is understandable, given that neither of them can really function until the caffeine kicks in--and hands Jongin a piece of toast with a blank face. Which is normally how he appears, but Jongin prides himself on being able to read the subtle nuances in Sehun’s many dark looks. Right now, even this damn early in the morning, he can tell that Sehun’s pissed off. 

 

“What is it?” he asks, biting into the toast. Sehun just glares at the floor, and Jongin uses it as an excuse to stare at the hollow of his throat, his eyes travelling down to the collar of Sehun’s work shirt. 

 

“Nothing,” Sehun says, petulant. When they both come home from work Sehun drags him over to the television and they play video games for an hour. It almost feels like normal--it should feel like normal--except whenever Jongin’s phone buzzes Sehun visibly startles and everything feels stilted.

 

\--

 

Jongin asks Joonmyun for advice, because Joonmyun’s studying to be a doctor (the betrayal still stings, honestly; joonmyun was more of a competition math champ than sehun is) and is supposed to be the Wiser Older Brother. It doesn’t really help much.

 

“It’s pretty obvious that he’s only been moody since the start of your relationship,” Joonmyun notes, twirling a pen through his fingers. 

 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Jongin replies. He knows what it means, but… no. Sehun’s never really expressed any interest in dating him, or anyone, since forever. Then again, Sehun can only really tolerate three people: Jongin, Soojung, and sometimes Youngho. 

 

“What do  _ you  _ think?” Joonmyun throws back at him.

 

“Hyuuuuuung,” Jongin whines, despite himself.

 

“Maybe he’s afraid of losing you, or something. I know Sehunnie doesn’t really like change, does he?” Joonmyun smiles wryly.

 

Jongin raises his eyebrows. Could he  _ possibly _ be referring to the ancient historical event of 14-year-old Sehun crying at Joonmyun’s high school graduation, a memory that has (sadly) been threatened and coerced into never, ever being mentionable in any context?

 

He must notice what the change in Jongin’s expression implies, because Joonmyun hurriedly stands up and leaves  _ his own office _ . 

 

“So, yeah,” Joonmyun calls out behind him. “Just remind him that things won’t change!”

 

Jongin slams his forehead down onto Joonmyun’s desk.

 

-

 

Yet again, Jongin stands by the door of Sehun’s room, just peering within and contemplating what to say. He’s been doing a lot of thinking nowadays, really, far too much for a brain much more suited for the complexities of number theory than the complexities of humanity (read: Sehun Oh). 

 

“What is it?” Sehun calls out. He’s lying on his bed with his laptop, long fingers typing furiously. Jongin’s gaze lingers on them for a second, before remembering why he’s here and staring at the floor. 

 

“Krystal wants to come over and hang out here tomorrow,” he says. “That okay with you?”

 

“Like a date?” Sehun asks.

 

Jongin hesitates and looks up at Sehun’s stony face for a split second before shifting his eyes. “I’d like it if it was the three of us, actually,” he says, trying to maintain eye contact. “Just like the old times.”

 

“Just like the old times,” Sehun repeats. His face is unfathomable.

 

“She agreed to it, you know,” Jongin says quietly. He doesn’t know what the hell caused the fallout between Sehun and Krystal in their senior year of high school, but it was big enough for her to run away to Stanford while everyone else was studying in the Northeast.

 

“Sure, why not?” Sehun shrugs. “We started--we started talking again, actually, after she moved back and you were trying to flirt with her.” He smirks. “I might’ve helped with that by telling her some informative  _ stories _ .”

 

“It was you--you told her about that time in elementary school when I--you know--oh my God, I thought it was Joonmyun the whole time,” Jongin says between peels of laughter, shaking his head ruefully. “Sehun, you asshole.”

 

Sehun grins. “Get over here, I want you to do something,” he says, beckoning Jongin towards the bed.

 

“What is it?” Jongin asks, clambering onto the bed and scooching a little closer than necessary, the side of his body flush with Sehun’s.

 

“Problem-writing for Johnny, that lazy ass,” Sehun says fondly. Johnny is about as lazy as Sehun is stupid. “He just wanted me to go over the proof questions for HMMT to make sure there wasn’t, like, a degenerate triangle or something.” 

 

“Um,” Jongin begins, because he’s the type of number theory/combinatorics guy who gets the hives from even thinking about proof-based Euclidean geometry, “I hate geo? Geo hates me? I don’t know?”

 

Sehun rolls his eyes. “Hyung,” he says, which is a good sign that he’s (adorably) exasperated with Jongin, “Just plot the points on Geogebra. I’ll do the real thinking.”

 

“You’ve always been the brains,” Jongin says, laughing. “I’m the visuals.”

 

“Definitely,” Sehun says dryly. He pokes Jongin in the thigh. “Now can you plot the points? I bet Donghyuck ten bucks that Johnny would make at least one geo problem trivial by forgetting about bary bashing.” 

 

“Fine,” Jongin grumbles. Maybe he should be mildly concerned that Sehun’s waging bets with spawn-of-devil high schoolers, but he’s far too relieved with the return of their easy camaraderie to really complain.

**Author's Note:**

> please let me know what you think if you read~ 
> 
> thanks for reading!


End file.
